Leave Me in the Gray
by xenophileCorvid
Summary: "It is gray outside, but the dorm room is full of colors that I love—the smell of the fire and the crimson and gold curtains, rich and satisfying. I'm told Hogwarts is beautiful, and I know it is. I can appreciate it in my own way." Karkat x Terezi; John x Dave; Hogwarts AU
1. Colds and Quidditch

**Summary/excerpt: "It is gray outside, but the dorm room is full of colors that I love—the smell of the fire and the crimson and gold curtains, rich and satisfying. I'm told Hogwarts is beautiful, and I know it is. I can appreciate it in my own way." Karezi; Hammertime; Hogwarts AU**

**Rating: T for language, slash, and possible mature themes later on**

**Main pairings: Karkat x Terezi; John x Dave**

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Terezi's P.O.V.

It's the time of year when the air of my dorm room is cold enough that I wake up with a frozen nose, but it still seems too early in the season to leave a fire going all night. I stretch under my covers, shivering as my feet hit the cold, untouched area of the bed around me.

I sit up and wrap my arms around myself as I draw the curtains and slide onto the floor. My feet cry out in shocked discomfort as they hit the icy stone floor. It doesn't seem like anyone else is up yet. Drawing in a deep breath, I rub my arms and pick up the wand sitting on my bedside table, then flick it in the direction of the fireplace. Instantly, the room feels ten degrees warmer.

I walk to the window from which I can smell the slowly brightening sky and the wet ozone from the rain. It is gray outside, but the dorm room is full of colors that I love—the smell of the fire and the crimson and gold curtains, rich and satisfying. I'm told Hogwarts is beautiful, and I know it is. I can appreciate it in my own way.

My stomach growls and I dress quickly and hurry down the stairs to the Gryffindor common room, where I find Dave and John sitting in silence on the couch in front of the fire. Dave smells sleepy, but nods at me. I sit down between them so that all of our legs are touching. John frowns.

"Good morning," I say, sleep apparent in my voice.

"Morning," Dave groans.

"We were just about to head to breakfast," says John, standing. I follow his lead and pull Dave up with me, and the three of us walk together to the Great Hall.

John doesn't like me much, but I'll admit that I haven't been the nicest to him. Last year I caused a pretty major accident on a broomstick that landed him in the infirmary for a week. To be completely honest, it wasn't really an accident, either. Dave and I were dating at that time.

Dave and I are really good friends despite our breakup five months ago. Our relationship never really made it all the way from platonic to romantic, and we'd eventually decided to give the idea up. It ended up being for the best. I like our dynamic now.

The Great Hall is one of my favorite places at Hogwarts. There are so many wonderful scents and flavors. At this time, there aren't very many students around as it's pretty early. Most of them will show up within the next fifteen minutes, but we like to come early for breakfast before it gets too noisy. We sit at the end of the Gryffindor table, Dave and John across from me, and students soon begin trickling into the room. The food has already appeared on the table when I feel a presence plunk down in the seat next to me, close enough that I can just barely feel the warmth coming from his body. He lets out a frustrated sigh. Karkat. I'd know the smell of him anywhere. He is one of my best and oldest friends.

"Good morning, Karkat," I greet him.

"Yep, it's a f-ing lovely morning. Just look at that beautiful rainy sky." He gestures to the ceiling with his middle finger, and I frown. He is unusually grumpy today.

"Your panties too tight?" Dave asks.

Karkat flips him off, then quickly glances around to make sure that none of the teachers are watching. John snorts into his mug of hot chocolate and spills some on the table, quickly moving to sop it up with his napkin. Dave takes out his wand and finishes the job, and it ends up much neater than it would have otherwise.

"What's wrong, Karkat?" John asks.

"Nothings wrong, nooksniffer," he says, and then mumbles something about Ravenclaws. I pop a strawberry into my mouth and chew it slowly—red food is the best for thinking. I think about his Ravenclaw friends. It couldn't be Kanaya, so it had to be Sollux, which was my first guess anyway.

"Is it Sollux?" I say quietly, so that the boys across the table can't hear.

He clenches his jaw and shakes his head forcefully. I decide not to press the issue because I don't want to deal with an even angrier Karkat.

"What's your first class today?" John asks no one in particular.

"Potions," I say.

"Charms," Karkat grumbles.

"I'm sure you do great in that class," I grin.

"Yeah, Karkat's a real charmer," says Dave, face as straight as always. I know he's being sarcastic, but it's true. Karkat may be thoroughly unpleasant most of the time, but he has some sort of strange ability to make everyone like him. Even now, he smelled adorable.

"I have Defense Against the Dark Arts first," John says. He looks like he's about to continue, but his words are drowned out by the sudden arrival of the owls and the sound of a plethora of wings as they swoop over our heads and drop envelopes and parcels on the tables in front of us.

I have a letter today, and I tuck it away to read later. The rest of breakfast flies by in a flash and soon I'm sitting down in potion's class next to a messy-haired Hufflepuff named Gamzee. I like potion's class because there are lots of interesting smells. On the other hand, I always find it hard to resist tasting some of the potions that seem potentially delicious. The only thing that stops me is the consequences of whatever the potion does. That doesn't stop me from sampling the ingredients, though. No one else seems to have the problem of wanting to consume the potions except for the boy sitting next to me. Somehow, his potions always manage to turn into a bright, sickly green slime, no matter what he was originally supposed to be making. It's not nearly as appetizing as the successful potions, and I'm surprised he's even passing this class.

We set about creating the Drought of the Living Dead, one of the teacher's favorite potions to assign. I'm doing alright at first, but Gamzee keeps adding things to the potion at random until it turns the usual color and consistency. He sticks his finger in it, pulls it out, and licks the green slime off. Then he tries to convince me to try it.

In History of Magic, I sit with Karkat and Sollux in the back of the classroom, near the fireplace, and doodle pictures of dragons in a courtroom in my notebook. This is by far the most boring class—several of the students asleep, some are passing notes, others are doodling or daydreaming, and a blonde Gryffindor girl in front of me is writing a story complete with illustrations.

I hear paper wrinkling next to me and turn to find Karkat clenching a note in his fist. He shoves it into his pocket and scribbles something down too quickly and messily for me to smell what it says. He folds it in half and slides it forcefully towards Sollux. I can tell they're fighting—they're always fighting—but there's something different about this.

I write at the bottom of the page I'm drawing on and tilt it so Karkat can see.

_H3Y K4RK4T WH4TR3 YOU P4SS1NG N0T3S 4BOUT?_

He snarls and writes on his own page.

_NONE OF YOUR FUCKING BUSINESS._

_:[ F1N3 1LL 4SK SOLLUX_

I tear out a piece of paper and reach across Karkat towards our Ravenclaw friend, but Karkat snatches it out of my hand before Sollux can touch it. He crumples it up and puts it in his pocket with the other note. Then he folds his arms on the table and buries his face in themand stays like that for the rest of the lecture.

After classes, I don't see Karkat in the common room where he usually is this time of day. Instead, it's just Dave and a seventh-year girl, each going about their own business. Dave looks like he is working on Transfiguration homework, but I know that isn't likely.

"Hey Dave," I say, and when he doesn't respond I wave my hand in front of his face. He turns slowly to look at me and I can tell that he has some sort of silencing charm around his head. He is probably listening to music. He turns the music off, though, and hands me a drawing.

I cackle as I read through the comic. I swear this boy is one of the wittiest people I know. I shuffle around in my book back and pull out a scrap I tore from a poster. I've drawn a pair of sunglasses onto the wizard in the moving picture, cleverly missing his face by just a smidgeon. Dave cracks a grin and folds the picture into the pages of his transfiguration book.

"Have you seen Karkat?" I ask.

"Nope. Sorry. We were gonna watch the quidditch team practice, too. I guess he's blowing me off."

I frown. "He's been acting kind of weird today."

"Nah, not Karkat. He's always like that."

Dave is wrong. I know that he and Karkat are good friends, but I've known Karkat longer and I can tell when something is up.

"Well, I'm gonna go to quidditch practice," I say, and walk up the stairs to put my books away and change before walking through the drizzling rain and the squishy wet grass toward the quidditch field.

I had to try out for the quidditch team three years in a row before they finally let me on. They tried to be sensitive and came up with all sorts of reasons that I didn't make the cut, but I knew that it came down to the fact that I'm blind. But this year, I finally convinced them that I'm good enough. I'm one of the three chasers. Our team is good, but it's not great. We beat Hufflepuff already, but our upcoming game against the Ravenclaw team has been making everyone nervous.

The quidditch field is soggy and the team stands around in wet silence as we listen to our captain, Jake English. He goes on and on and I start to tune him out. It's really too cold to be standing in the rain like this. My nose is starting to run and I sniffle.

We mount our brooms and begin our regular practice. Jake lets the snitch and the bludgers loose, and they begin zooming around the field. I'm flying back and forth at full speed, and my ability to "see" is dimming with my sense of smell as the cold make my nose run. I try to wipe my face with my sleeve, but it's wet and it doesn't really help. I'm loosing my surroundings as I'm forced to breath through my mouth, and suddenly I can't tell where I'm going. I've lost the quaffle and my teammates and the goals.

"Watch out!" someone yells. Except I can't see. And if I had time, I would make some sort of sarcastic remark to express such. However, before I can say anything, something collides with my head, and I'm tumbling to the ground.

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**A/N: Hello, lovelies! I'm estimating that this story will be 15-20 chapters long. I already have the first four written, so I hope to update regularly (about once a week.) **

**A big thanks to my sister for beta-reading.**

**Please leave a review on your way out.**


	2. Detention

**Warnings for this chapter: none**

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John's P.O.V.

Sometimes Defense Against the Dark Arts is my favorite class—when we learn hexes—and sometimes it is just boring. Today it is just boring. I'm sitting next to my best friend, Dave, and watching as he draws comics in the margins of his textbook. I idly twirl my wand around in my fingers, even though I know better than to do that. It's dangerous. But I'm bored. The teacher looks turns to face the class and I quickly set my wand down before she can catch me being irresponsible. Sighing, I begin humming one of my favorite tunes. It's a romantic muggle song.

"Mr. Egbert," says the professor, Ms. Serket. She cat-eye glasses a form-fitting blue dress under her robe. She's the kind of teacher that students get crushes on, much like my cousin, Jake. Personally, I don't like her much. Something about her seems like she's always manipulating people, even if I can't pinpoint anything specific. Her gaze reminds me of a spider.

"Yes?" I answer.

"Five points from Gryffindor. It's rude to sing while your teacher is speaking."

I don't say anything. Instead, I glance at Dave. His expression is unreadable, as normal. He goes back to his drawings as soon as she turns her attention from us.

Sighing, I rest my head on my desk and dream up a prank to pull on Ms. Serket. I could charm all of her books shut. But spells can be traced back to wands—I learned that the hard way—so it's best the stick with old-fashioned pranks that don't involve magic.

My thoughts are interrupted when Dave taps my arm and points at his notebook, where he has written something.

_wanna watch the quidditch practice with me and karkat_

I shake my head, and before I can reply, he's scribbling something else.

_if you need to study i can help you get done faster_

I shake my head again and write a response in my own notebook, placing it where he can see it.

_Detention_

_ what for_

_ The library prank last week_

I see a hint of a smile at the corners of his mouth.

When classes are over, Dave leaves me to meet Karkat and I walk to the library where I will be doing some sort of chore. I honestly feel a little bit left out. Dave and Karkat are both my friends and they get to go have fun together without me. I know it's my own fault, but who wanted to read those books, anyway?

The library is furnished beautifully, but it is dismal with the gray light coming in the windows. I'm very conscious of every step I take because it is so quiet in there. Some of the floorboards creak, and I feel like everyone will turn and look at me if I make too much noise. Surprisingly, there aren't many students in the library right now. I stop at the front desk to find out what I need to do. The librarian gives me a piece of paper and a quill and sets me about writing an apology note to all the students that I inconvenienced. The prank had been a simple one, in which books began swapping titles. Someone might pick up a book called _Spell Etiquette_ and find instead everything they ever wanted to know about dusk-blooming choke vine.

When I finish the apology, I am assigned the boring task of shelving books. I've never been very good at alphabetizing anything, and this job is long and boring. The librarian tells me that I can go as soon as I finish shelving the cart that I'm assigned. She also takes my wand so that I have to do it manually.

I'm sitting on the floor and almost half-way through when I hear footsteps behind me and small cough. I turn around to see a boy with ashy hair and bloodshot eyes looking down at me. He's a Slytherin, wearing a long scarf and a wool sweater and looking incredibly frail.

"Um, hi," I say.

"Hello," he replies.

There is a very awkward silence. I glance at the books, then back at him, and twiddle my thumbs a little. I decide to introduce myself.

"I'm John."

"I'm Henry," he says, punctuating it with a cough. "What did you do?"

"Oh, I just played a little prank," I explain. "Now I'm paying for it."

"They can trace spells back to the wand that casts them," he offers.

"Yeah, I know that now." I clear my throat. Why is he talking to me? I'm a Gryffindor.

"Um... can I have that book?" he points to the book I'm about to shelve—_The Healing Magic of Underwater Faeries._

"Yeah, sure!" I hand it to him and smile, hoping that he goes away. I don't want to be caught talking to a Slytherin, but I don't want to seem rude.

"Thanks."

He stands there in silence for a few more seconds, then sneezes and walks away. I let out a relieved breath and go back to alphabetizing the books.

It takes me almost another hour to finish, and I hurry back to the Gryffindor tower. The common room is empty except for Dave, sprawled on the sofa and sleeping with his mouth open, an open book resting on his stomach. His shades are slightly askew and I can see a few freckles on his cheek. I stop for a moment and walk slowly towards him.

Naturally, my first instinct would be to take this golden opportunity to play a prank on him. But as I look at his sleeping face, I suddenly lose my motivation and the grin I was wearing fades. It's amazing that Dave doesn't have a girlfriend—he's so handsome, why wouldn't he? It wasn't something we ever talked about unless Karkat was driving the conversation, and even then Dave and I never really said anything about our own feelings.

I pick the book up and glance inside to find more doodles like ones he'd been doing in class. Setting the book aside, I sit on the floor next to him and lean my head against the couch as I flip through his text book. He's written some really terrible raps along some of the pages, and I can't help but snort at some of his lyrics.

The room is silent enough that I can hear the rain tapping at the windows and Dave's even breathing, and crisp turn of every page as I flip through the book. The entire thing is rather relaxing, actually. I could fall asleep right here on the fluffy red carpet. Suddenly, the door bursts open and Karkat comes stomping in. He plops into an armchair and lets out a long, irritated sigh. I feel the sofa cushions shift behind me as Dave sits up. He yawns, and then turns his attention toward Karkat.

"You stood me up, bro," he says with mock disappointment.

"It's not like it was a date," Karkat replies.

"Yeah. You're right. John and I had a good enough time without you."

"Actually," I begin, "I just got out of-"

"Quidditch practice was the shit," Dave interrupts me.

"Well I'm glad you had fun standing in the rain," says Karkat.

"We did, didn't we John?"

"Oh, yeah... I guess," I say, waiting for Karkat to point out that neither of us are wet, and that the quidditch practice shouldn't even be over yet, and Dave was asleep when he entered the room. But he doesn't say anything, which is rare for him.

"Where'd you go, anyway?" Dave asks.

"None of your sweet sticky bumbling business."

At that moment Jake English enters the room, his face a mess of anxiety. He looks at the three of us like he wants to apologize and says, "You chaps should probably hurry down to the infirmary. It's Terezi."

Dave and Karkat exchange a look, and both of them are on their feet in seconds and whisking out of the common room. I follow them, because what else am I supposed to do? They're practically running and hardly waiting for the moving staircases, and it's quite a job to keep up. Neither of them seem winded when we finally reach the infirmary, but I'm taking deep breaths through my nose and trying to look composed. I make the mistake of walking in with them and I realize then that I should have stayed outside. Terezi is lying unconscious on one of the beds, her face a blood-stained mess. Both of them rush towards her, but the nurse stops them.

"One visitor at a time," she says sternly. Karkat gives Dave a pleading look, and he nods and leaves the room, placing a hand on my shoulder on his way out to indicate for me to follow him. He's a nervous wreck as we wait outside. He runs his hands through his hair once—something I've never seen him do before, and leans against the wall outside the infirmary. I don't say anything, and instead just watch him peek in the window every few minutes. I feel like I should offer some kind of comfort, but I don't know what to say. The whole thing is incredibly awkward, and I wish I could leave or do something useful.

Sollux shows up after a while and asks us what's going on with Terezi. We can't tell him since we don't know anything ourselves. Eventually, Karkat emerges from the infirmary.

"She broke several bones and got pretty scratched up, and they think she has a concussion, but chances are that she will be fine." He addresses this to Dave, who nods and pushes past him through the infirmary doors. Karkat stands next to me for a moment, glares at Sollux, and gives him the middle finger before walking away. Sollux smirks and watches with amusement as he leaves.

I step towards the doors and peer in the window. Dave is standing next to Terezi's bed. He's saying something that I can't hear. He picks up her hand and squeezes it then carefully brushes some hair out of her face. He looks so incredibly gentle and something in the pit of my stomach is churning. The nurse approaches him and he nods at her and glances toward me, but I don't think he sees me. Then he leans down and lightly kisses Terezi's forehead.

I step away from the window, something sinking in my chest. I can't really explain the feeling that is washing over me, but it is something like being hit by a cold wave. I can almost taste the saltwater. I look briefly at Sollux, who is still standing next to me, and then take off as fast as I can without actually running.

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**A/N: So I'm planning on posting the next chapter on Saturday. It's already written, so it's not like I have to crank it out before then.**

**Someone commented that they thought it was strange that Gamzee is a Hufflepuff. My logic behind this was that Hufflepuff is the house that will take anyone who doesn't fit into one of the other three.**

**Also, a HUGE thanks to my lovely sister for drawing the beautiful cover art!**

**It would be really nice and helpful if you left a review :D**


	3. Things Go Downhill

**Warnings for this chapter: slight Solkat, even though this is a Karezi story**

Terezi's P.O.V

My world is colorless. I can't smell anything and I feel an urgent need to lick something just to get my bearings. Where am I?

I try to sit up, but my head hurts and there's a pain in my ribs.

"Terezi!" says a familiar voice.

"Karkat," I respond, my voice weaker than I expected and shaking as I try to hold back tears. "Where am I?" It's okay, I tell myself—just a stuffy nose. But my body hurts and I'm so confused.

"We're in the infirmary. Do you remember what happened?"

I've never heard his voice so concerned before. It's lost its usual edge and it's actually really calming.

"I was playing quidditch, and it was cold," I reach my hand out toward him and he catches it in his own. It's warm and dry and it feels so nice I want to melt into his touch. But I can't. "And I couldn't smell anything, and I fell. That's all I remember."

"A bludger hit you," he tells me, and I hear squeaking like a chair being scooted on the floor. His voice is slightly closer now. "You've been out all day. They say you have a concussion and a few broken bones, but those might be fixed by now."

Of course. Quidditch accidents are common. I really shouldn't be as freaked out as I am. I take a deep breath through my mouth and try to taste the air, but it isn't any use. "What time is it?"

"Half past eight. They probably want you to spend the night here."

I start to nod, but it hurts and I snarl instead. "I think I have a cold."

"You can't see anything?"

"Yes, Karkat, because colds make you blind," I say sarcastically. But it's true.

"Sorry," he mumbles. I hear the sound of tin foil crinkling, and Karkat says, "Open your mouth." I do, because I trust him, and he places something deliciously red and sweet on my tongue. It's incredibly comforting to taste my favorite color. He knows exactly what will make me feel better.

"Thanks," I say around the candy.

He lets go of my hand, and the air feels cold and empty.

"I need to get back before curfew," he says, and I hear his footsteps turn around and walk away, leaving me in the darkness.

"Good night, Karkat," I say, but I doubt he hears me.

I'm back on my feet by breakfast, bones healed and head almost recovered, and my stuffy nose is only a sniffle. I can make my way around, but nothing is clear and the more movement there is the more disoriented I become. The nurse walks me to the great hall and helps me find my usual seat where I wait for my friends. Dave and John show up a few minutes later, and Dave sits next to me for once instead of across from me with John. Then he walks me to my first class with his arm around me, even though it will make him late for his own. While I'm incredibly grateful to have such a good friend, I hate having to depend so much on others.

In History of Magic, Karkat and Sollux are passing notes again. I try to get Karkat's attention, but he seems distracted. He glances at Sollux then sets a note on his desk, slightly under the corner of his book, and pretends to be listening to the lecture. When he isn't looking, I slide the note out and unfold it under the table. The words are hard to read from that far away, but I manage it eventually.

_YOU WERE WORRIED TOO. AND THE TEREZI THING WAS A LONG TIME AGO._

Worried about what? Probably me. But my accident was yesterday. Whatever was a long time ago that I was involved in, I didn't know what it was. But I was awfully curious.

_WH4T T3R3Z1 TH1NG?_ I write above his sentence, and slide it back to him.

He turns red and crumples the piece of paper. I raise an eyebrow and grin mischeviously.

_4R3 YOU H1D1NG SOM3TH1NG K4RK4T?_

_ ITS NONE OF YOUR FUCKING BUSINESS. _He replies.

_ 1T 1S 1F 1TS 4 T3R3Z1 THING. _I point out. He begins to write something then scribbles it out.

_ITS NOT IMPORTANT._

_ 1 SM3LL L13S._

_ WHY DO YOU EVEN WANT TO KNOW? ITS NOT LIKE IM HIDING ANYTHING FROM YOU._

_ K4RK4T YOUR3 B31NG R34LLY 1MM4TUR3._

_ YOURE THE ONE STICKING YOUR NOSE INTO EVERYONE ELSES PRIVATE CONVERSATIONS._

_ 4T L34ST 1 DONT T4LK 4BOUT MY FR13NDS B3H1ND TH31R B4CKS._

_ IT WASNT LIKE THAT! I WAS JUST MENTIONING YOU IN PASSING. IS THERE ANYTHING WRONG WITH MENTIONING MY FRIENDS? LIKE, "HEY, DID YOU SEE WHAT JOHN DID TO THE BOOKS IN THE LIBRARY?" IM SURE JOHN WOULD BE REALLY UPSET IF HE HEARD ME SAYING THAT._

_ :[ _

He ignores me for the rest of the class and I can't get rid of the nagging curiosity about their conversation, or my sense of suspicion. Something is definitely going on, and I will figure it out one way or another. I slump over my desk and draw unrecognizable dragons in my textbook for the remaining twenty minutes.

By noon my sinuses have cleared I'm almost back to normal. Karkat isn't at lunch, and I can't help but wonder where he went.

"Where's Karkat?" I ask Dave. He shrugs.

"I think I saw him with Sollux just a little while ago," John offers.

I turn towards the Ravenclaw table, but neither aforementioned boy is there.

"I smell something fishy," I say, standing.

"Those must some seriously funky fish," Dave says.

"You bet they are. But I'm gonna go look for him."

"Why? It's Karkat. He's probably throwing a fit about a plugged up toilet or something. He's like a crazy wind-up toy that you set off and it goes spinning in circles until it spins off the table and keeps whirring round on the ground all jittery and shit and then it finally runs out of juice. Not apple juice, though, 'cause that stuff was made by Merlin himself."

I grin and leave the boys to their lunch as I head off to find Karkat. I check the common room first, and then the boys dorm, but I don't catch a whiff of him anywhere. Eventually, it's time for my next class and I still haven't found him. I gather my books walk up the staircase in the direction of my class, down a long corridor and past one of my favorite colorful paintings. I'm nearing the Astronomy Tower when I turn a corner and stop dead in my tracks.

I know that my nose isn't deceiving me, but I don't want to believe what it's telling me. Standing in a little window nook is Karkat. And Sollux. And they're snogging. They pull apart as they hear my footsteps, and I back up quickly, then pivot and run in the other direction. I faintly hear a familiar voice call my name, but I keep going anyway. My class is just a little ways from here if I take a short cut. I rush up another corridor, slip behind a tapestry, through a tunnel, and land in the hallway right across from where I need to go. I run into the classroom where I sit down quickly and bury my face in my book.

I'm not sure what to feel right now, but I certainly don't feel good. My head starts to hurt again, and my chest aches, and there's this horrible buzzing feel in my stomach and I want to puke. Maybe it's from running when I'm not fully recovered, or maybe it's from the scene I just witnessed, or maybe it's a reaction to something I just ate. Whatever the case, I don't want to sit through a lesson. I raise my hand feebly.

"Miss Pyrope," says the professor.

"I think I need to go to the infirmary," I say wearily.

"Alright. Have a friend take you."

My professors were informed of the accident, so It's no surprise that I'm released so easily I stand up and gather my books and the Hufflepuff sitting next to me takes them and walks with me to the door. Her name is Nepeta and she wears an enchanted cat tail that swishes back and forth, and a blue cat-eared hat. We are pretty good friends. We used to play games together a lot, but we've grown apart somewhat since we're in different houses and only share a few classes.

"How do you feel?" she asks. "Does your head hurt?"

"Yeah. I feel like shit."

She puts her arm around me and I hate how much it comforts me. We take the long walk back to the infirmary together, and she sits on a stool beside my bed while the nurse prepares a potion for me.

"You look really upset," she says. "Did something happen?"

"It's all Karkat's fault," I respond.

"What did he do? If it isn't too impurrtinent of me to ask?"

"He's just an asshole, that's all."

"It's okay if you don't want to tell me," she says. I lean my head back and close my eyes. I don't want to talk to Nepeta about this. I know she had a crush on Karkat at one point, and I don't know if she's over it yet. I can't trust her enough to let her know about my own feelings that I've been harboring for years.

"Thanks," I say.

"No purroblem!"

I'm given a potion and I'm back on my feet again in a few hours. I sit around in the common room, hoping that company will keep my mind away from other things. Dave sits with me and we take turns adding to a collaborative drawing. John joins us but doesn't say much—he just watches us and speaks only when Dave addresses him.

People have been coming and going all evening, so I don't notice when Karkat walks in, Sollux in tail, until John speaks up.

"Hey there, Karkat!" his voice is suddenly cheerier.

"Hey, asshole," he replies.

"Hi, Sollux," John says.

Sollux gives a halfhearted wave.

"So are you two a thing now?" Dave asks bluntly.

"What?" Karkat looks surprised.

"You were holding hands when you came in," John explains.

"Yeth," says Sollux. "We're pretty much offfithally a thing."

Karkat is turning red—something I usually love. But right now, it makes me sad and angry. I know I'm being stupid and selfish, but my reaction is kind of involuntary. I'm incredibly glad for my glasses, because I know my eyes would betray me.

**A/N: I meant to get this up this afternoon, but I ended up going off-campus because it's my birthday and I didn't want to sit in my dorm all day.**

**So you can probably see now that there will be a triangle with Terezi and Karkat and Sollux. But this is still a Karezi story. Don't give up.**

**Please leave a review!**


	4. What Happened to Karkat

**Warnings for this chapter: Solkat. If you really hate this pair, you may want to skip this chapter entirely.**

**This chapter basically just tells us what was going on with Karkat while Terezi was in the infirmary. I promise this will be the only chapter with this much solkat.**

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Karkat's P.O.V

Almost twenty-four hours ago

I'm standing on the Astronomy Tower at night, looking out over the Forbidden Forest and the lake which catches the moonlight in the folds of its waves. There is a little wind stirring my hair and sounding off the castle walls. It's beautiful and eerie. It's cold enough that I can see my breath in the light of my wand, and I'm out here alone even though it is past curfew. If I'm caught, I'll be in trouble, but it really isn't hard to sneak around. With how big Hogwarts is, the teachers really can't keep track of everyone, and I am no exception.

The Gryffindor common room felt wrong and depressing without Terezi there, so I snuck out earlier than I'd planned.

I hear footsteps coming up the stairs, and turn to see Sollux approaching. He's tall—at least by my standards—and lanky, a pair of enchanted 3D glasses always perched on his nose. His uniform is wrinkled carelessly, and his shoes don't match. Somehow I find all of this incredibly attractive.

"Hi, KK," he greets me, and walks to where I am standing. He rests his arms on the wall and looks out at the lake. "Tho where were you after dinner?"

"I went to visit Terezi. She woke up," I explained.

"That'th good, I gueth."

"Yeah. It's really good," I heave a long sigh.

"You were really worried about her, weren't you?"

"I still am, asshole. Weren't you?"

"Well, yeth, but I think the nurthe can handle it. Quidditch acthidenth are pretty common. It'th not like they haven't dealt with broken boneth before."

"She's blind, douchewad!" I nearly yell, clenching my fists. He turns to look at me and frowns. "Terezi is important, okay? We've known her longer than we've even been going to Hogwarts, and just because she has that tone-deaf frond nub now doesn't mean that she doesn't need us anymore. Terezi may seem strong but she's still a girl and—shit, that's not what I mean. Just the fact that that sniff-node of hers can smell colors doesn't make her completely independent. What happens if she gets sick and can't smell anything? Then she's resorted to licking everything, and you know how that would end. You and Terezi are friends, too! Why don't you care what happens to her?"

"I do care, dumbath. I jutht know that the'll be fine." He puts his hand on my head and rubs my hair, making it messier than it already was. I duck out from under his reach and cross my arms.

"You don't get it!"

"Yeth, I do. You love TZ."

"No!" I shout. "I mean, of course I do, but no!" I did love Terezi once. I had the stupidest crush on her that ended in me with a broken heart when she started dating Strider. Their relationship had lasted long enough that I'd had to make a serious effort to get over her. Sollux had been a big help then in more ways than one. I still loved Terezi, but it just wasn't the same kind of thing. I would sacrifice anything for her, but the object of my affection had shifted. I can't tell if Sollux believes me, though. He knew about the Terezi situation, and I thought he knew that I was over her. But things had been getting tense between us lately when I heard that he had a crush on me and confronted him about it. Now we were at some awkward stage that I can't define because I really don't know where we stand.

Sollux shakes his head. "Whatever, KK." He turns his back to me and starts to walk away. I want to call after him and end this fight like every other, but something feels different. It's not like our usual banter, full of name-calling and empty insults. It's heavy, and I don't like it.

"Are we still friends?" I ask. That's what I always say after our fights, because I value his friendship more than whatever kind of a grudge I might hold over something that was said. But this time, I'm not sure what I mean by it. Apparently, neither is he.

Sollux pauses and looks back at me for just a moment. And then he says over his shoulder, "I don't know, are we?" And then he disappears down the stairway. I can't be sure, but I think I saw a smirk on his face.

_I hope not._

I stand alone on the Astronomy Tower for a few moments. There is a howling in the distance. The wind picks up, swooshing hair into my face and blowing right through my sweater, making me shiver. I hear Sollux's echoing footsteps fading away. The cold air wraps around me and I go still for a moment, my breath hanging in front of me, and then I take a step forward, spring into a run, and bound down the stairs after him.

"Sollux, wait up, you shitty excuse for a friend!" I yell after him, and I can hear his footsteps hesitate slightly then keep going.

I pick up my pace, almost leaping down the spiraling stairs, and suddenly he's right in front of me and I can't stop and _wham_. I crash into him and the two of us tumble down the steps and come to a stop on the landing.

Now we're on the ground in an awkward heap and I quickly disentangle myself. He sits up and rubs his head, straightening his glasses. "What wath that about, KK?"

I take a deep breath and grab his blue-striped tie, pulling his face close to mine. "You can't just leave me hanging like that, you miserable ass-face!"

He's laughing now, and that only fires me up more.

"Who do you think you are, walking off and leaving me with a question as if you expect me to rethink what I've said or have some sort of epiphany? What business do you have waltzing away leaving me wondering if we're even still friends, or not at all, or something more, or whatever the fuck you wanted me to think! I'm sick of all your bullshit and fucking around with my emotions with your stupid attitude and that sexy lisp and your damned Ravenclaw brains! Why can't you just answer my fucking question and-"

"KK," he interrupts.

"Shut up and let me finish! You're a-"

"Karkat," he says.

"Just listen to me, damn it! Every day I have to put up with all of your-"

Suddenly I can't say anything else because his mouth is covering my own. It takes me only a millisecond to realize that he's kissing me, but I can't process it. I freeze as I try to understand the situation. My mind is blanking. What should I do? I begin to mentally berate myself as the answer is obvious, but quickly forget this train of thought as I close my eyes kiss him back. He responds enthusiastically, reaches a hand up to cup my face. I let go of his tie, which I realize only then that I am still holding, and let my hand drop gently to his knee.

I'll be honest—this is my second kiss ever. The first was Terezi, during our third year at Hogwarts, about a year before she started going out with Dave. It was the result of enchanted mistletoe, where I was waiting for quite some time to catch her. This was totally different. With Terezi I felt bad about it because I didn't think she actually liked me. And even though she seemed perfectly fine with the whole thing, my own guilt had ruined my first kiss for me. But Sollux started this. And there is something so incredibly romantic about this—kissing on the landing of a tower staircase, sitting in a puddle of moonlight that's coming in the window.

I pull away first and we take deep breaths and try to regain our composure. Sollux is smiling and blushing, and I realize with embarrassment that I am too.

"Sorry," I say, although I don't know why.

"It wath my fault," he says, standing up and offering me his hand. I take it and don't let go when I'm back on my feet. Sollux laces our fingers together. We stand there in silence for a moment, and then I kiss him again, shorter this time.

I hear something in the distance and both of us are still as we strain our ears to make it out. Yes, someone is definitely coming up the steps. There isn't much to be done now. We'll be caught out of our dorms one way or another.

A prefect emerges from around the corner. She's a Ravenclaw with a round face, short dark hair and glasses. Jane, if I remember correctly.

"Sollux!" she says, her voice scolding. "And... Karkat, right? What are you doing out after curfew? I'm sorry but I'm going to have to report this."

And so we receive detention. But it's worth it.

The next day, I don't see Sollux until our History of Magic class, which is during second period. We sit in our usual seats, him on my left and Terezi on my right. I feel like I need to say something to him, but I can't right now. He grins at me slightly, and I grin back just a tiny bit. He passes me a piece of paper before the class even begins, but I wait until the teacher starts talking to read it, mostly because I know that Terezi is likely to try to read it over my shoulder.

_2o about la2t niight...what diid that mean?_

Well this is awkward. I have no idea how to answer this question. I just stare at the paper for several minutes, until he gets fed up with waiting and starts scribbling something.

_Fiine, ii'll 2ay iit. KK, ii really liike you. a lot._

Fuck fuck fuck. What do I say? I've got to be flushing so hard right now. I put my head down on my desk so that hopefully Terezi won't notice, and write on another piece of paper which I slip under the table to pass it to him.

_ I LIKE YOU TOO, SHITWAD._

He's smiling now as he replies.

_ii ju2t wa2n't 2ure what wa2 goiing on with you e2pecially wiith the TZ thiing_

_ I TOLD YOU I WAS OVER HER._

_ yeah but iit diidn't 2eem liike iit wiith how worriied you were_

I write my reply, but the teacher is looking directly at us so I slide the note partially under my book and wait for him to turn around again. But he doesn't for quite some time, and Terezi grabs the paper before I can give it to Sollux.

Her face is mischevious, but her grin fades as she reads the note. She picks up her quill and writes on the back, creating a giant ink blot in the process.

_WH4T T3R3Z1 TH1NG?_

I crumple the piece of paper up and shove it in my pocket. This is none of her business. But Terezi is persistent, as always.

_4R3 YOU H1D1NG SOM3TH1NG K4RK4T? _She writes on the parchment in front of her, tilting it toward me. I write under it with my own quill

_ ITS NONE OF YOUR FUCKING BUSINESS._

_ 1T 1S 1F 1TS 4 T3R3Z1 THING._

She has a point. But it was _my_ stupid crush that I had on her, and it was over now. _Over_. No longer relevant. Therefore, she had no business in my old beeswax.

_ITS NOT IMPORTANT._

_ 1 SM3LL L13S._

_ WHY DO YOU EVEN WANT TO KNOW? ITS NOT LIKE IM HIDING ANYTHING FROM YOU. _It isn't entirely true. I went to great lengths not that long ago to make sure Terezi didn't know I liked her. And if she finds out about it now, it could really mess things up with Sollux. And I really like the direction we're heading at the moment.

_ K4RK4T YOUR3 B31NG R34LLY 1MM4TUR3._

_ YOURE THE ONE STICKING YOUR NOSE INTO EVERYONE ELSES PRIVATE CONVERSATIONS._

_ 4T L34ST 1 DONT T4LK 4BOUT MY FR13NDS B3H1ND TH31R B4CKS._

_ IT WASNT LIKE THAT! I WAS JUST MENTIONING YOU IN PASSING. IS THERE ANYTHING WRONG WITH MENTIONING MY FRIENDS? LIKE, HEY, DID YOU SEE WHAT JOHN DID TO THE BOOKS IN THE LIBRARY? IM SURE JOHN WOULD BE REALLY UPSET IF HE HEARD ME SAYING THAT._

_ :[_

I turn my attention back to Sollux.

_we need two talk for real. let2 meet iin the liibrary at lunch_

_ OKAY_.

The library is one of my favorite places in Hogwarts. There is actually a pretty decent selection of romance novels if you know where to look. It's surprising to find them in a school library, but this is Hogwarts, so who cares?

Sollux is sitting in the windowsill of a great round window that looks out over the hills on the other side of the lake. The sun is lighting up his face and the ends of his hair and he looks so damn sexy like that.

"Hey there, douthefathe," he says as I approach.

"Hello, nincompoop," I reply

"You're getting weak, KK. Nincompoop? What kind of a half-athed inthult ith that?"

"Nincompoop is a great insult, grubsucker."

"Eheheheh," he laughs, getting up and stepping toward me."Whatever, KK."

I'm at a loss for words. I suddenly want to kiss him really bad, but I don't give in. He puts his hand on my waist and I instinctively draw a bit closer. His free hand takes my own and he pulls me to him. The heat of my face tells me I'm blushing like crazy.

"F-fuck," I say. Sollux is smirking. I don't care anymore. I grab his collar and pull him down into a harsh kiss. I can feel he's smiling and I pull away quickly, spin around in the other direction so I don't have to look at his pretty face. He wraps his arms around me from behind.

"Thankth, KK."

Damn that lisp is hot.

"So where does this leave us?" I ask, taking a deep, shaky breath.

"I don't know. What do you think?"

"Boyfriends?" I say quickly, sqeezing my eyes shut. It's incredibly hard for me to ask.

"Yeth. I like that," he replies.

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**A/N: Hang in there, Karezi shippers! I promise that this will be a Karezi story.**

**I plan on posting the next chapter tomorrow, since this one was kind of a downer. The next one will much much happier.**

**Please leave a review!**


	5. Why Dave is My Best Friend

**Warnings for this chapter: a little fluff**

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John's P.O.V.

Dave likes potions class. I don't. The only nice thing is that we get to talk while we're working on our potions. Class is held in the dungeons and because of all the weird ingredients and lack of airflow, it usually smells pretty funny. There is only a tiny bit of natural lighting coming from a few small windows at the top of the walls, but otherwise the room is lit by candles. It's incredibly warm from all the fires and boiling cauldrons, and most of us have shed our sweaters and scarves, which now lay draped over the backs of chairs. I'm concentrating hard on trying to get my potion right because I can't risk another bad grade right now. Dave doesn't seem to have any problem with the recipes at all, commenting on the ingredients that he finds most interesting.

We have one more class after this until we're done for the day, and I find myself glancing at the clock every few minutes. I cringe as I lift a couple of dripping bat spleens out of a jar and drop them in my cauldron. The rest of the class drags on and it's a huge relief when it's over, even though I'm not finished with my potion.

I head towards transfiguration, not waiting to make sure Dave is following me. He is, of course, and he appears by my side as soon as I start walking down the hallway.

"So what are you doing this afternoon?" he asks, hands in his pockets.

"Homework, probably," I say.

"Oh. Want to study with me?"

"I actually thought I would go to the library," I reply.

He shrugs. "So I'll come to the library."

I frown. Dave peers at my face and his brow knits.

"Hey, what's wrong, man?"

"Nothing."

"You've barely said anything to me all day."

"We've been in class."

"So? You even sat on the other side of the table at lunch."

I shake my head. "Dave," I begin.

"Dude, you can't do this to me. Did I say something?"

"No! I told you, nothing is wrong."

"Fine. Whatever. It's not like I'm your best bro or anything,"

We reach the transfiguration room and find our usual seats. I like this class considerably more than potions. What isn't fun about turning things into other things? Today we work on changing plants into chickens and then turning them back again. This is supposed to be easier than turning a non-living object into an animal, or vice-versus. Dave manages to transform the plant quickly, but it becomes a crow instead of a chicken. He has to cast a body-bind spell on it to keep it still long enough to try again.

After school I decide to take a walk. I really don't feel like doing my homework quite yet, and the clouds that covered the sky this morning are gone. The air is clear and cool and the autumn sun casts long shadows across the ground. I sit on the grass, close my eyes and take in the smell of the fallen leaves and feel of the sunlight on my face, since I know it won't be here much longer. Suddenly, there are familiar footsteps and I sense a presence behind me.

"Daaave," I whine. "I don't want to talk right now."

"Okay," he says, and sits next to me, our shoulders brushing as he does. We sit in silence, a slight breeze noisily ruffling the paper-dry leaves, and I can faintly hear Dave's breathing. I won't admit it, but I'm actually quite grateful for his presence. After a few minutes, I move slightly towards him so that our arms are touching, and he shifts so that we're leaning against each other. I can't describe the way I feel right now. It's like my chest is filling up and ready to overflow and it's so satisfying and frustrating at the same time.

It's times like this that I realize why Dave is my best friend. There just aren't words for the bond we have, and so sometimes we need to just be silent. There is nothing awkward about this silence—it's peaceful and relaxing and I could sit here with him all day. And then I remember that he thinks I'm mad at him. And I don't want him to think that. I'm not happy with the way everything has been going, but I'm not mad at him. And I know that he won't say anything until I do, because he's loyal like that.

"I'm not mad at you," I say quietly.

He nods.

"I'm sorry if you thought I was," I add.

"Nah," he replies. "It's cool, dude. We all have those crappy days."

"But I was kind of rude."

"Don't worry about it. You're allowed to be a little rude to me. We're bros."

"Yeah," I say, forcing a smile. I don't understand why I suddenly have this dropping sensation, but I want it to go away. I stand up and offer Dave my hand to pull him up. He takes it and doesn't let go once he's standing, and I pull him down the hill towards the lake and the Forbidden Forest.

This is normal, right? I actually don't think much of it at all. I've seen friends holding hands before, and we just had a heart-to-heart almost-conversation. It doesn't matter that my heart is soaring right now, or that I'm grinning like I've just played the best prank in ages, or that I want to tell everyone that I have the greatest friend in the world and he's _my _best friend and not Terezi's or Karkat's or anyone else's.

The fallen leaves crunch under our feet and the weather is actually quite nice for the end of November. It's a wonder that there hasn't been more rain yet. But the air is brisk enough that I pull my scarf over my chin and tuck my free hand into my pocket. The air is noticeably cooler as we approach the lake.

Dave and I take turns casting spells on pebbles and watching them do flips and skip and jump across the water. He enchants one of them to simply float, and tosses it into the water.

"What's that for?" I ask.

"It's ironic as hell, man. This kind of shit could have saved lives hundreds of years ago. Think about all the witches that would have survived the trials if they'd just enchanted rocks to float."

The sun goes behind a cloud and the lake darkens. I glance at the sky to see large clouds in the distance.

"What time is it?" I ask.

"Almost five. Why?" Somehow Dave always knows what time it is. I didn't wear a watch so I always have to ask when there isn't a clock around.

"Do you think we should head back?" The walk back up the hill always take longer, and dinner is at six.

"Sure, if you want," he says.

We walk slowly along the edge of the Forbidden Forest as the sky darkens, pretending to be making our way back to Hogwarts when we are, in fact, not getting any closer. Neither of us mentions this, but we're both aware of it and not planning on changing our course anytime soon. Dinner isn't for a while yet, anyway. And who actually does homework at wizarding school?

"Next week there's a Hogsmeade weekend," I point out. "Are you going?"

"Are you kidding, Egbert? Of course I'm going. How else am I gonna find Christmas shit for everyone. And the Yule Ball is next month, so there's that to think about, too."

The Yule Ball is an old Hogwarts tradition that used to be associated with the Triwizard Tournament, which was a pretty rare occasion. However, the ball now takes place every year due to popular demand, and is always the source of much excitement and drama.

"Oh. Are you planning on taking someone?" I ask, suddenly realizing how cold it is out here, and rubbing my arms to ward it off.

"I guess not," he says, his breath making a little puff of steam and hanging in front of his face for a second.

There is a rumble from the sky, and we look up to see ominous clouds right above our heads.

"Really? Why? I bet Terezi would go with you."

"You forget that Terezi's my ex," he says.

"So what?"

"That means 'been there, tried that, it didn't work.' It's like when you get a really great idea like microwaving cookie dough, and you're all excited to put that shit in the food-zapper, but when it's done and you take it out and you're ready to eat your delicious radiated cookie, it ends up just looking like a pile of dog barf sitting on volcanic rock."

I laugh, partly out of relief and partly from amusement. Somehow, I'm sure that he's tried it. Microwaving cookie dough, that is. Dave's a half-blood, and I'm muggle-born, so we're both pretty familiar with non-magic lifestyles. In fact, I'm a movie addict, even though many of the students at Hogwarts don't even know what a movie is.

I feel something cold hit my hand, and then a little splash of water appears on the lens of my glasses. I've been looking for some sort of spell that would work like windshield wipers for them, but haven't found one yet.

Neither of us say anything. Dave grabs my arm and we run, but it only takes a few moments for the sky to open up and suddenly it's raining sheets. By the time we take cover in a corner of the courtyard, we're already pretty damp and Dave's hair is hanging in his face and mine is looking flat for once.

We sit on the small bit of dry ground there and stare at the storm. It would be easy to get up and dart only a few more seconds across the courtyard and inside, but neither of us move.

"Today is Friday," I offer somewhat pointlessly.

"Bravo, Egbert. Is there anything else you'd like to share with the class? While we're at it, why don't we all just open up and share our feelings about this important issue, because this is the kind of shit that really matters and someday you'll be glad that you studied days of the week and other useful things like divination instead of useless shit like polynomials."

I punch his arm lightly. "No! I mean that tomorrow is Saturday!"

"Okay. You've hooked my interest. In fact, my interest is a worm that you pinched in half and threaded onto a barb only to plop into it a river until some fish comes along and eats it."

I ignore him. "So what are we going to do tomorrow?"

"I don't know. You think of something."

"Well I thought it would be fun to pull something on Karkat, because we haven't done that in a while."

"Oh, yeah. We haven't. And now is the perfect time, what with Sollux and everything."

I frown. "Something about that doesn't seem quite right."

"What do you mean?"

"Well, I'm fine with it. It just seems like... those two hated each other."

"Nah. They never really hated each other. They just fought a lot. It was probably just repressed sexual tension."

"What about Terezi?"

Dave shrugs. "I guess she'll just have to move on. Besides, she might not even like Karkat anymore. But why are we talking about her, anyway? I thought we were going to prank Karkat?"

"Right," I say. I pull a piece of blank parchment from my robes and tap it with my wand. "_I solemnly swear that I am up to no good._"

Ink begins swelling onto the page, forming lines and gathering into a map. I acquired the Marauder's Map during my second year and it has been incredibly useful for both getting into and staying out of trouble.

"Okay. Where is Karkat?"

Dave looks over my shoulder and we search the map for the tiny dot that represents our friend. I check the usual spots first—the common room, our dorm room, the corridors and stairs between the Gryffindor tower and the Great Hall. When all of those failed, I look closely at areas which are more congested with names, as it can often be hard to discern who is who when they're all scrunched together like that.

I can see two little dots in the courtyard that represent Dave and me. We're the only ones here. I spot our friend Rose in the library with her Ravenclaw girlfriend, Kanaya. There are a few other dots there. One of them is the sickly Slytherin boy I met there the other day.

I can also see a lone dot in the headmaster's office. It is labeled W.V., and I smile slightly as I think of our headmaster. He doesn't say much, but all the students love him. He is by far the best headmaster of any school in the country. The first year I came to Hogwarts, he was working on getting the title of "Headmaster" changed to "Mayor," but it never happened. There was also a time during which he assigned all the transfiguration students to go around the school and clean things up by turning pieces of garbage into tin cans. Although this raised many questions, it was more fun than our usual lesson, so few of us complained. No one knows what happened to the cans, though. Rumors say that he keeps them in his office and has built a town out of them. Dave swears he's seen it.

Dave spot's the dot representing Karkat first. He points to the Ravenclaw tower on the map, and he's right. There are several dots in the common room, two of them close together near what I assume is a window, but it's too small on the map to really tell. They are labeled _Karkat Vantas_ and _Sollux Captor._

"What kind of prank would get both of them in one shot?"

"Hmm... what was the last thing you did?" Dave asks.

"I made all of Karkat's romance novels read themselves aloud whenever he opened them," I say, giggling.

"Oh, yeah. I remember that. That was over a month ago."

"All the more reason to prank him now," I say. _"Mischief managed_."

The map sinks back into the parchment and I fold it and hide it in my robe pocket again. I turn to Dave and give him a questioning look, as if to ask if he plans to sit here all night. He doesn't move, so neither do I. We just watch the rain fall on the dark courtyard, creating hundreds of little ripples in a puddle just a few feet from us. It's getting really cold now since we're damp and not moving anymore. I shiver slightly, and Dave shifts closer and leans the side of his head against mine. My stomach is fluttering and the strange feeling in my chest is coming back and suddenly I'm really happy and I could sit here for ages, regardless of how cold it is. I know that I'm supposed to be brainstorming, as he likely is, but all I can think about is Dave.

There's a squeak as the door across the courtyard opens, and then some footsteps, muffled slightly by the rain, and I hear voices. One is a girl, familiar, but without it's usual mischievous edge. The other is masculine, gravely and drawling. Then there is a third, small and hesitant. I can barely tell it's there. The three voices hold a short conversation, and I can't hear anything they say over the sound of the rain. And then the door opens and shuts again, and one set of footsteps splashes onto the wet cobblestones.

Dave stands, and I follow suit, and we watch a figure run toward us, a hand over her head. As she gets closer, I notice that it's Terezi.

"I thought that was you guys," she says when she reaches us, ducking out of the rain. Her hair doesn't flip out now that it's wet, and it's clinging to her neck and ears and face.

"What are you doing out here?" Dave asks. He unwinds his scarf and drapes it over her shoulders. "You're going to catch cold, and then you'll be blind again."

I waited for her to make some kind of guilt-inducing jab at him for bringing up her blindness, but she doesn't. Instead, she ties the scarf and forces a smile.

"I've been looking for you guys," she says. "Dinner's about to start, so you should come back inside."

"She's probably right," Dave says to me. He pulls the hood of Terezi's robe over her head, even though she's perfectly capable of doing that herself. "We'll meet you inside in a few minutes, 'kay?" he says.

She glances at me, nods, and hesitates before splashing back across the courtyard and inside the castle.

"Are you worried about her?" I ask.

He frowns. "A little. Something's wrong."

"She seemed like normal Terezi to me," I offer.

"Running out here like that?" he says. "Yeah. But she knows what it's like when she can't smell. She's a fucking bat, just without all that freaky radar, so more like one of those star-nosed moles that digs tunnels and doesn't even need eyes because of it's nose, but when it gets above ground, it doesn't help all that much. And then she has to go around licking things and that's just nasty and it scares people, so it's best if she just doesn't get sick."

"So what about Karkat?"

"Oh yeah." Daves pulls up his hood, and I mimic him. "Think of anything yet?"

I shake my head.

"Neither did I. Okay, we'll each come up with a plan by breakfast tomorrow. And then we'll use whichever one is better."

"Sounds good to me," I say, grinning. We turn towards the rain, and I'm tempted to grab his hand or his elbow, but I don't.

"Ready?" Dave asks.

"Yeah."

"Okay, let's go."

And with that, we dash out into the storm, and even the short distance across the courtyard is enough to finish soaking us both. We burst through the doorway and stand in the entry, shaking from cold, our clothes dripping onto the stone floor, my glasses fogged up from the sudden heat so I can't see. Despite everything, it was more fun than I've had even before the library prank, and we're both smiling and laughing a little, and maybe I'm crazy but my heart is about to leap right out of my chest.

I am so in love with him.

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**A/N: I got this chapter up today just like I promised! And I'm going to visit my roommate's family this weekend so it could be about a week until you see the next one.**

**Please leave a review! I would really, really appreciate it.**


	6. Wicked Elixir

**Warnings for this chapter: intoxication**

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Terezi's P.O.V.

I'm sitting in potions class, but my cauldron is empty. Everyone else around me is busy measuring out beetle eyes and salamander blood, carefully stirring their potions, crushing wasp wings with their mortars and pestles. I keep reading the instructions over and over again, but they have no meaning and I absorb none of it. When I get to the end of a sentence, I've already forgotten what was at the begging, or what I was even reading about in the first place. I sigh and lean back in defeat. I can't get Karkat off my mind. Or Sollux, for that matter. I know it isn't fair to them, but I feel kind of betrayed. They were both my friends, and now they're. . . what? Not? No, they're still my friends, and I have no right to be feeling betrayed. Or even jealous, for that matter. The truth was, there was a time that I probably could have had Karkat, had I been brave enough to actually do something about it more than just tease him and act like it was a joke. I can't help but wonder if things would be any different if I had never gone out with Dave. But, no, this isn't his fault, either. And once again I have to remind myself that I'm being ridiculous and the only one to blame is myself. _Guilty._ It's all my own fault that I'm in this situation now.

My face must really look like shit, because my desk partner abandons the usual green ooze in his cauldron and turns to me, sitting down and resting his arm on the back of his chair as he looks at me with concern.

"Whats all up and botherin a friend?" There's something silly about the cadence of his voice, but he seems sincere. I kind of want to just pour the whole story out. But that would just make me look pathetic, so I don't.

"Nothing's wrong," I lie. I hate lying. I hate deceit. It stinks.

"Now don't go on lying like that," Gamzee says. "You look like some motherfucker up and was killin your favorite dragon or something."

I smile grimly, but don't offer an answer. Gamzee and I have actually known each other for quite a long time. I wouldn't go as far as to say we're friends, but he's close to Karkat, or at least he was, so it's kind of inevitable that we know each other pretty well. Actually, I haven't seen those two talk to each other in probably an entire month. Odd.

"Y'know?," he drawled. "you could join me after all these teachin' friends get done sharing their words of wisdom and I can work some miracles to help you out. You look like you could use a good dose of wicked elixir."

I don't know what he's talking about, so I just nod and turn my attention back to my potions book. Either he gets the message or is satisfied with my response, because he doesn't bug me again. Even by the end of class, all I've managed to come up with is a cauldron of boiling saltwater. I could make pasta with this just as well as... what were we even working on, anyway?

In History of Magic, Karkat sits between me and Sollux as usual. The two of them are not passing notes today but I think they're holding hands under the table. Karkat's blushing a little. I try to distract myself by drawing pictures in my notes—designing a new layout for Can Town, which with a little work I could present to the headmaster. But I give up half-way through and just scribble unintelligible shapes along the borders of the paper and spirals like little ink tornadoes where my notes should be. Neither Karkat nor Sollux say a word to me the entire hour we're there, even as we pack up our books and leave the room. I can't help but be a little hurt, because I don't remember doing anything to warrant their ignoring me. On the other hand, I didn't try to speak to them, either.

I share my herbology class with Dave. However, we somehow end up on opposite sides of the room as we trim our plants and all I get from him is a friendly nod at the beginning of class while we're listening to instructions. He takes off right as we're released and I don't see him again for a while.

My day already sucks, and by the time classes are out, I have a shitload of homework to do. I head to the library and spread my textbooks out across an entire table, taking up more room than one person could possibly need on this giant wooden mesa. Then I sit there and stare at those books with a furious boredom, and my mind wanders to all the other great things these books could be used for rather than homework. I could build a fort out of them, and hold court inside of it. Each book could have some sort of mystery behind it—used as a murder weapon, or secretly be an encrypted message from some prisoner a hundred years ago, or—a boring old wizard who wanted to torture innocent kids with flowery words and convoluted texts about over-complicated spells. Really, when am I ever going to need a spell that lets me charm ants into synchronized dance formations?

A shadow slides over my cluttered workspace, and I look up to see Dave peering over my shoulder.

"Hey, Dave," I say.

"'Sup, Terezi?"

"Square-dancing insects," I explain. He nods sympathetically, although I doubt he has a clue what I'm talking about.

"Have you seen John around here?" he asks.

I glance around the area of the library that I can see and shake my head. "Sorry. Did you need him?"

He sits down in the chair next to me, and I assume he's ready for a feelings-jam of some sort. It's not something that's particularly normal with us, especially with our history, but I would have to consider him one of my best friends and if he wants to vent then I'm not going to be a bitch about it, even if he isn't there for me when I could use a shoulder.

"Is something wrong?" I ask, sighing. I've never been good at comforting people. In fact, I'm much better at causing discomfort. But in this case, I will try. I love Dave. In a platonic way.

"John's ignoring me," he says. I wonder what his expression looks like underneath his shades. All I can see are very subtle changes that I can only pick up because I know him so well—an ever-so-slight downturn of the mouth, his position with his arms crossed when he usually exudes confidence.

I don't know how to answer him, so I just wait for him to continue. When he doesn't, I figure I'm going to have to get to the root of this.

"Is it justified?" I ask, closing the book I wasn't reading to signify that he has my full attention.

"I can't think of anything I did, and he won't tell me," he says. His hand goes to his hair and he combs his bangs backward, something I know he would never do within his normal cool act.

"Maybe he's just having a bad day," I suggest, resting my head on my hand.

"That's not like John," he mumbled.

"Everyone has bad days, Strider," I tell him.

"No, I mean he never ignores me just because he's having a bad day," he explains.

"Maybe you're misinterpreting him?"

"I don't know." He exhales and sinks backward in his chair, tilting his head toward the library's fancy ceiling.

I'm kind of confused. This isn't much like Dave. Doesn't he usually take these kinds of problems to Rose? This is not my area of expertise. Our relationship works around a shared sense of humor, not helping each other with our problems.

"Why don't you go find him?" I suggest.

"That's what I was trying to do. He said he was going to be in the library."

"But he's not here," I finish for him.

He nods.

"Then why are you still here?" I ask, almost hoping that he would say he wanted to talk to me, that he would stay and distract me from my homework. Alas, of course he doesn't.

"Yeah, you're right," he says, and gets up, the chair making an awful screeching sound against the floor. He doesn't bother to push it back in before he walks away.

I set my head down on my open book and sigh deeply. I can faintly hear the ticking of a clock, creaky footsteps in the distance, someone turning a page, the edges of a hushed conversation. The book my face is in smells kind of nasty. For a few minutes, I let my thoughts wander. Dave visiting me here has probably been the best part of my day, which is looking on the dim side right now. The image of Sollux and Karkat kissing comes back into my head, and I try to draw my mind away from it quickly. It doesn't work. Instead, I pull myself upright and nearly jump out of my seat as a figure sitting across from me meets my nose.

It's Gamzee. He smiles lazily at me and gives me a rather profane greeting.

"Why are _you_ here?" I ask, not in the mood to deal with this guy.

"I thought you were gonna all up and join me," he says.

"Where?"

"Just a place filled with motherfuckin miracles."

What is he even talking about? I sigh in frustration and drop my book on top of another with a satisfactory thud. I could use a break from this mind-numbing work, anyway. And Gamzee seems to think whatever it is will help me.

"Okay. Fine," I say, standing.

He grins at me, grabs my hand, and pulls me away from the table where my books lay abandoned. We exit the library and he still doesn't let go of me. His hand is big and clammy and it's making me feel somewhat awkward.

"You know I can walk without a guide, right?"

"Oh, sorry, motherfucker," he chuckles, and lets go. "Didn't mean to get you all offended."

I frown. The whole being-offended act is part of my routine, and I usually get a certain amount of amusement from making people feel guilty about it. But this time I'm just annoyed.

Gamzee leads me into corridor upon corridor, up stairs, and through passageways. I have no difficulty following him because he has a very distinct smell. Eventually we stop in front of a tapestry in a hallway. It depicts a gate framed by bright trees and is bordered in a nicely-scented maroon. We duck behind it and arrive in a small hideout with what seems to be another tapestry-covered entrance at the other end. It is dimly lit with a few candles, and there are two boys sitting on the ground among what smells like bicycle horns. One of them is a rather small-ish, stuttering Hufflepuff who has dimples when he smiles—Tavros, I think—and the other is a Slytherin named Eridan, admittedly handsome but incredibly obnoxious.

Gamzee sits between them, stepping on the horns and making a huge racket, and motions for me to join the group on the ground. I sit gingerly next to Tavros and fold my legs beneath me. The stone floor is cold and I can't imagine the last time anyone has cleaned in here. I take in a deep breath and wonder what the hell I'm doing here.

"How about some wicked elixir?" he asks. "What color is being your favorite? Wait, I know, it has gotta be red."

He hands me a bottle of red liquid that he seems to have pulled from nowhere. It sizzles when I open it, and I slowly bring it to my lips, not really sure why I'm about to drink something I know nothing about on the recommendation of a guy like Gamzee.

I drink it anyway. While the color is delicious, I'm not very fond of the actual flavor of the drink. It tastes like cheap soda, full of chemicals and corn syrup. Even though I'm able to taste the difference, color overrides real flavor, and I drink the entire thing. My head feels a little funny afterward, and when I try to pay attention to what the three boys are talking about, it takes me a minute to grasp their words. My mind is pretty fuzzy. I attribute it to studying, and maybe the concussion isn't quite as healed as I'd thought.

"And noww she wwants nothing to do wwith me," Eridan is saying when I tune in. He scowls and crosses his arms over his chest. I honestly don't care whatever he's whining about, but I listen anyway, taking frequent swigs of my drink, as he rambles on about a girl who somehow dumped him even though they were never really together in the first place. Gamzee pats his shoulder and tries to give him a Faygo. Is that what this drink is called? Eridan is reluctant but takes it eventually, and that shuts him up. Tavros seems uncomfortable in the corner, glancing between us and his toes.

"Why you feelin so down right unhappy for, motherfucker?" Gamzee asks, and it takes me a minute to realize that he's talking to me.

I slump slightly and contemplate telling them. Why not? It would feel good to get it all of my chest. I don't see any good reason not to trust these guys. I feel strangely safe and maybe if I tell them I won't feel so bad anymore. I don't know what kind of logic that is, but I'm trusting it now.

"Did someone dump you, too?" Eridan asks.

I shake my head. "It's Karkat," I begin, fiddling with my now-empty bottle.

"Wwhat about him?"

I swallow, and it hurts. "He likes Sollux now." There is a horrible pang in my chest as my mind flashes back to them kissing in the hallway. The way that Karkat held his face, and Sollux's hands on his waist. The way their hands were clasped together when they entered the common room. And a brief memory from something years ago, an instance with enchanted mistletoe, the first and only time I had ever kissed Karkat.

"How did you come of thinking that?" Gamzee asks.

"They're dating," I say, frowning at the floor. I sink forward until I'm curled up in a ball. I want to cry, but I don't.

"I don't understand, motherfucker. Maybe you could you get your explaining on?"

There's a pain in my throat and I blink rapidly and bury my face in my knees.

"I just," I try to say, my voice muffled, "it hurts. Because I l-like him."

There is a silence as they take in what I said, and then a horn honks as someone moves. I expect a comforting hand to fall on my head or my shoulder, but there is nothing.

Finally, Eridan says, "Wwho? Sol?"

"No, Karkat," I breathe, and pull myself to my feet. I'm wobbly and have a hard time keeping my balance, and I trip over a horn only to catch myself against the wall. Slowly, I hobble out of the room, hoping to leave before I have to hear a verdict on my confession. I feel sick.

The light in the corridor is incredibly bright, making it hard to smell anything else, and I stumble into a coat of armor, knocking in over with a loud clatter. I don't bother to apologize as it gets back to its feet, and when it is back in position, it flips me off.

There is a chorus of honks from inside the hideout, and Gamzee emerges from behind the tapestry. He puts his hand on my shoulder and says, "Don't you be worrying. Just wait for a motherfucking miracle. They're everywhere."

I nod, but internally I'm shaking my head. Miracles aren't real. There is magic, and justice, and injustice, and mercy, and cruelty, but no miracles.

I head back toward Gryffindor tower, but once I've turned a few corners I realize that I have no idea where I am, and I'm feeling awfully dizzy. I feel like I might have gone in a circle. There's that statue that we passed on the way here, so I must be going in the right direction. I keep going, and a few minutes later I want to vomit. Whatever that sickening carbonated substance was, it was making me ill. Maybe it was alcoholic—that would explain a lot. I decide to sit down for a moment, just to collect my bearings and hopefully make my stomach a little bit happier. I lean against the wall and sink to the ground. My breathing is heavy, and my eyes sting. Somehow, it's really warm in this hallway. I let my head drop forward and close my minutes, I'm asleep.

When I wake up, I feel a lot better. I inhale and find that Gamzee and Tavros are standing above me.

"It was, uh, probably the Faygo," Tavros is saying.

"I didn't know it would make a motherfucker pass out like that,"

The light from a window a few feet away tells me that it is considerably later than it had been when I fell asleep.

"What time is it?" I ask, and both of them are startled to hear me speak.

"It's, uh, um, five-forty," Tavros says.

I get to my feet and dust my pants off. My head hurts a little, but otherwise I'm fine. I push past them and realize that I don't know where I am.

"Which way is Gryffindor tower?" I ask.

"We'll walk you up over there," Gamzee drawls.

"Actually, dinner will be soon," Tavros points out. "Um, maybe we should head in that direction."

"You're right, bro. Don't wanna be missing anything important like that,"

And so I walk with them to the Great Hall, instead. As soon as we enter, Vriska, a Slytherin girl, grabs Tavros by the elbow and drags him away while he stutters in protest. Gamzee chuckles, but doesn't seem concerned, and goes to sit at the Hufflepuff table. Dave isn't in his usual spot, and neither is John. Karkat isn't here yet, either. I slide down the table a ways and ask my quidditch captain, Jake English, if he's seen either of them.

"I think I saw John outside earlier today," he tells me.

I bite my lip as I contemplate whether or not I should go find them. They might have lost track of time and not even know that dinner is about to start. Yes, I decide, acting more on impulse than really thinking of reason to go after them.

As I get up, Gamzee also rises from the Hufflepuff table. I think nothing of it until he blocks me on my way out, and starts blabbering in his gravely voice. I don't pay attention to what he is saying, because it sounds like the usual codswallop. Nevertheless, he walks with me toward the door.

"And then he told me that there's this Hogsmeade weekend thing," he says as we exit the Great hall and I tune in. He goes on about it, and I'm only half-listening, slightly annoyed. And then Karkat comes into sight. Sollux is with him, and he has his arm around Karkat's waist. There is a little twinge of jealously in my gut as I watch them. Neither of them acknowledge my presence as they pass.

"So I am just wonderin if you would all up and come with me," Gamzee says.

I stop right in front of the door, and glance at the couple, their backs now turned. There's something about the way they lean towards each other that irritates me.

"Sure," I say, smiling at Gamzee. And maybe it's just that the effects of the Faygo haven't worn off yet, but I think I can work this to my advantage.

"Motherfuck! Yeah!" he says. Tavros appears at his side and I tune out of their conversation, then step outside into the rain.

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**A/N: A huge thanks to King Toothy for beta-reading! And another big thanks to all of the followers and reviewers and even you silent readers. **

**Please leave a review on your way out! It would be very much appreciated.**


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